Jon Stewart Calls Epstein Files ‘Groundhog Day’ as Powerful Names Face No Consequences

Jon Stewart didn’t hold back on the latest episode of The Daily Show, taking aim at the newly released batch of Jeffrey Epstein files and the familiar sense of frustration surrounding them.

Stewart opened his monologue by saying the whole moment felt like déjà vu. Comparing it to Groundhog Day, he joked that every time these files come out, the public is promised shocking revelations — and every time, nothing really changes. In his words, it’s just “six more weeks of not knowing who any of the co-conspirators are.”

He also mocked media speculation that the documents could somehow damage Donald Trump or the MAGA movement. Stewart dismissed that idea entirely, arguing that past Epstein revelations have shown that political loyalty is rarely shaken by scandals, no matter how disturbing the details.

While the comedian made it clear that there is “awful stuff” in the new document release, he pointed out that many powerful names have appeared in Epstein-related files before with little consequence. Stewart rattled off a list that included Steve Bannon, Elon Musk, Bill Gates, Bill Clinton, Brett Ratner, Prince Andrew, and Richard Branson. Trump’s name, Stewart noted, appears thousands of times.

One of the biggest laughs of the night came when Stewart revealed that his own name appears in the files. He explained that Epstein once floated an idea involving Woody Allen doing a stand-up special, with Stewart possibly serving as host or narrator. Stewart joked that he was less disturbed by the mention than offended by the wording: “Somebody like Jon Stewart?” he quipped.

Despite the humor, Stewart’s tone turned serious as he spoke about accountability — or the lack of it. He argued that the release of these files feels less like a search for truth and more like “running interference” to protect powerful people. According to Stewart, the end result is always the same: public outrage, headlines, and then silence.

He closed the segment by contrasting the lack of consequences for wealthy and influential figures with the harsh realities faced by ordinary people. Stewart said that while politicians often complain about “sanctuary cities,” the real sanctuary is enjoyed by those with money and power — a place where even links to sex trafficking and corruption rarely lead to punishment.

“So far,” Stewart concluded, “nothing has happened to any of them — except Prince Andrew.” And even that, he suggested, feels like the exception that proves the rule.

The message of Stewart’s monologue was clear: the Epstein files may be shocking, but until real accountability follows, they’re just another reminder of how differently justice works for the powerful.